Alan L. Sklover - Sklover Working Wisdom

 
“The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: It is easier to say “My tooth is aching” than to say “My heart is broken.”

– C. S. Lewis

ACTUAL CASE HISTORY: Last month an article entitled “How to Ask for a Mental Health Day” appeared in the Wall Street Journal, written by “Work & Life” columnist Sue Shellenbarger. Sue is a well known and well regarded writer on matters of “Work & Life.” I respect and admire her very much. On this subject, in my opinion, she was entirely wrong in her approach and conclusion on this subject.

When I saw the title of the column, I gulped; I said to myself, “She can’t be recommending people request ‘mental health’ days, could she?” When I read the column, I gasped; she seemed to be headed that way. When I finished reading her piece, I groaned; sure enough, she seemed to be recommending that people be “honest” and ask their managers for “mental health” days off when they were needed.

LESSON TO LEARN: While I fully recognize that there is a stigma attached to having a mental health illness, I also view the phrase “mental health day” to be both an inappropriate use of that phrase, and laden with several, substantial and entirely unnecessary risks.

Also, while I dedicate much of my life to improving the world we live in, I also recognize that it is almost always unwise to create or accept unnecessary risks in doing so. My view is that it is 100% unnecessary, unwise and potentially hazardous to your job, your career and your reputation to request a “mental health day” at work, as well as, in itself, a touch dishonest. So, “Just Don’t Do It.”

WHAT YOU CAN DO: Instead, let’s just deal with the issue before us: feeling angry, spent, cranky, even on the verge of tears? Not sure you will be able to hold onto your temper if you go to work? Ready to explode at a work colleague? I get it; I’ve been there. But in such events, I strongly urge you to never, ever ask for a “mental health day” at work. Here are my thoughts:
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“In my last job it was dog-eat-dog. In my present job, it’s the exact opposite.”

– Mitch Daniels
President, Purdue University

At work, so often we think “On my next job, things will all be better . . . more cooperative, more collaborative, more conducive to success without stress and drama. As Mitch Daniels noticed in his career (including a stint as Governor of Indiana), “It usually is not true that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.” So much of “happiness at work” is a matter of adjusting your own expectations of others, and keeping them reasonable. Woof woof, bow wow; we all have a little bit of dog within us. (And that is coming from someone – namely me – who loves dogs.)

This quote was shared with us by Lewis of Bangor, Maine. Thank you, Lewis, for starting off our New Year with a winning thought about expectations and reality. If you would like to submit a proverb, quote or thought, please submit it to us at vanessa@executivelaw.com.

Need a model memo or letter to transmit a request or complaint? A good checklist or form agreement? For a complete list of our Model Letters, Memos, Checklists and Sample Agreements, Just [click here.]

Interested in Membership? It’s free, and has advantages, including discounts on our products. Just [click here.]

Need a private telephone consultation? Just [click here.] Evenings and weekends can usually be accommodated.

© 2018 Alan L. Sklover. All Rights Reserved and Strictly Enforced.

I’m walking into 2019 with a clear heart and mind.

If you owe me, don’t worry about it — you’re welcome.

If you’ve wronged me, it’s all good — lesson learned.

If you’re angry with me, you won — I’ve let it go.

If we aren’t speaking, it’s cool — I wish you well.

If I’ve wronged you, I apologize — it wasn’t intentional.

I am grateful for every experience that I received.

Life is too short for pent up anger, holding grudges, and
needless stress or pain.

I welcome 2019

Remember forgiving someone is for you — not the other person.

So don’t block your blessings.

Make 2019 a year of positivity and a season of forgiveness.

– Attributed to Kelly’s Greenhouse

This message was shared with us by Kristen, one of my favorite yoga friends and teachers. Namaste, Kristen. If you would like to submit a proverb, quote or thought, please submit it to us at vanessa@executivelaw.com.

Need a model memo or letter to transmit a request or complaint? A good checklist or form agreement? For a complete list of our Model Letters, Memos, Checklists and Sample Agreements, Just [click here.]

Interested in Membership? It’s free, and has advantages, including discounts on our products. Just [click here.]

Need a private telephone consultation? Just [click here.] Evenings and weekends can usually be accommodated.

© 2019 Alan L. Sklover. All Rights Reserved and Strictly Enforced.

To All of Our Blog Readers, Friends, Clients and Colleagues: “Our BEST WISHES for a Healthy, Safe and Peaceful NEW YEAR”

Thank you so very sincerely for making 2018 – our ELEVENTH year of publication – successful beyond our expectations.

May your 2019 be filled with the warmth of loved ones, the health we all sometimes take for granted, the joy of holding a newborn baby, the inner comfort of job security, and the wonder of a six-year-old about to open birthday presents.

All of Us at SkloverWorkingWisdom.com

© 2019 Alan L. Sklover. All Rights Reserved

Kwanzaa is derived from the Swahili phrase “matunda ya kwanzaa,” which means “first fruits of the harvest.”

It is a celebration of family, community and culture of those of African descent worldwide, celebrated from December 26 through January 1 of each year.

We wish every member of our “blog family” who celebrates the Kwanzaa holiday nothing but happiness, joy and inspiration on this special holiday.

And for those who do not celebrate Kwanzaa, may your lives be uplifted by the holiday’s meaning and spirit.

All of Us at SkloverWorkingWisdom

© 2018 Alan L. Sklover All Rights Reserved. Commercial Use Prohibited.