Question: When I resign from the small company I work for – where the CEO is my boss from hell – what reason do you recommend that I give for resigning?

I’d love to tell him the truth that it’s because of the emotional abuse, his erratic behavior and unrealistic expectations, but he would not understand and would turn the reason into trumped up inadequacies of myself.

Karen
Brisbane, Queensland
(Australia)

Answer: Karen, you’re wise to understand that “you cannot reason with a tree.” In fact, reasoning with a tree might just be easier than reasoning with a bully boss, because while the tree will be just as “dense” as the bully boss, at least the tree will not be vengeful.

Clearly, you need to come up with one or more explanations that do not make your “bully boss” upset, defensive or retaliatory. Here is a list of 18 non-volatile explanations I have prepared for you that just might work.               

“I enjoy working with you so very much. However, I have decided that I will be leaving because . . . ” 

1.  I want to change my career. 
2.  I want to go into business for myself [or with a friend or family member.]  
3.  I want more time with my family.
4.  I am in need of a shorter commute than this job entails.
5.  I want to work for a company where I might some day become a partner.
6.  I want to go back to school to learn new skills.
7.  I need a job that offers on-site day care for my children.
8.  I am considering having children, and becoming a stay-at-home parent.
9.  I need a job that provides for a traditional pension for eventual retirement.
10. I am seeking a job that might lead to international travel or assignment.
11. I have decided to work part-time and go to school part-time.
12. I am seeking a  job with a larger company that affords greater benefits.
13. I have decided to seek a job that has a potential for commission income.
14. I would like to telecommute, rather than being in an office all day.
15. I want to work with children.
16. I would like a job with more contact (or less) with the public.
17. I would like to get more exposure and experience working with the internet.
18. I would like to pursue my artistic side.

Karen, it is my hope and expectation that one or more of these explanations will “fit” you and, at the same time, provide a basis to leave your “bully boss” without (a) any threat, (b) any argument, (c) any belittling, or (d) any counter-offer.

Thanks for writing in. Hope you’ll continue to enjoy our blog. Good luck to you.  

Best,
Al Sklover

© 2011 Alan L. Sklover, All Rights Reserved.